living on my own terms.

I have to thank Allah for all that we have achieved this year. I have been decorating non stop and have built a summer house in the garden, it won’t win shed of the year but its lovely mashAllah.

The inside has been furnished for free Alhamdulillah. It’s not completely finished but it provides a retreat from the house mashallah.

I have refurnished literally all the rooms in our three bed for free or really low cost, using freecycle, nextdoor and gumtree Alhamdulillah. You would be so surprised to see the high quality of household items people give away for free. I also helped my mother and younger sister obtain lovely items for their home.

My older sister and I have always had a difficult relationship due to my father who divided us for his evil ways, we are now like friends mashallah. My fathers sister who is 73  stayed with me in summer for a family get together. Its beautiful that I can finally share time with my family. I am looking forward to the year ahead inshallah.

Breaking free was the best thing I achieved as surviving from one day to the next is no life. I lived in fear for 22 years and this past year has been hard as children will also try to control you but unlike your perpetrator they do actually love you and they just try to push you to your limits. I have still cried and still suffered with depression as living that long not being allowed to express your emotions comes at a price. I try my best to keep occupied with things that bring me joy. Changing the interior design of my home has helped to keep the very low moods under control. I still have them but a just keep moving forward inspite of feeling like giving up.

Its my youngest’s GCSE’s at the moment so I am trying to help her revise in the summer house. I bought her a beautiful prom dress from ebay for £150 a bargain as it was £400 and only used once not that you could tell. We watched you tube to learn how to do glam make up. Her prom was lovely.

Alhamdulillah Allah has provided our family with happiness free from fear. May Allah grant all women living in fear the strength to take back control inshallah.

Inshallah I hope everyone has a live free from fear.

 

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