We all have the power inside of us to break our chains. Sadly we don’t believe it possible, as the years pass by we become captive.
Our identity is unrecognizable as we accept our position, we lose our strength due to exhaustion fight leaves our body and we focus on just putting one foot in front of the other. We survive and endure our hearts being shattered .
We forget that once upon a time we were strong. We made our own choices and were happy. We go through the motions to maintain a calm environment for our children. Yet the reality is that the environment is far from calm. It’s toxic and they are being suffocated by the abusers poisoning the air with their behaviour. We try our best to compensate for having chosen a abuser for a father. We put ourselves at the bottom of everyone’s feet without even knowing it.
We were once strong and we can be again. We have the power to break free and live our lives as we chose. We deserve to be loved and respected.
Our abusers will never allow us to be the strong woman we can be. It benefits them for us to doubt whether we can survive without them. They had a good servant. They had someone they could oppressively control. They could be the king of the castle. Without victims they will just be men with low self worth. Therefore they will never walk away unless they find a replacement for us.
I used to hope he would move on and leave me in peace. That was never going to happen. Alhamdulillah I am no longer his victim. The hardest part now is releasing the invisible chains that still bind me to his rules. I lived by his rules for so long I find it hard to identify my own rules.
I’m decorating the house firstly because I was never allowed to and secondly to physically to completely transform my former prison. Now I have also started swimming and have made friends with some of the the women.