Just keep in mind that there will be a day inshallah, you can look back and be proud of what you were able to do when you thought you were at your worst. Leaving behind abuse is the best thing you could do for your children.
One day when your children are grown, they will realize what you did for them. They will mature and thank you for being a great mother inshallah.
They will tell you that they know you did the best you could under the circumstances that you faced. So, stay the course; you are strong and resilient. Leaving a marriage is very hard.
I do have some regrets. I wish I had escaped my abuse earlier and enjoyed my 3 children more when they were younger. Instead, I was so busy surviving, studying, planning for my freedom and keeping the household running smoothly.
I wish I had let the housework go and done more fun things with them. I couldn’t afford much because their father never contributed but I could’ve done simple things at home with them. I know now that I did the best I could at the time and you can’t change the past.
I just want to pass a little wisdom onto all you beautiful sister’s. Do something fun with your kids this weekend inshallah. Even if it’s just playing board games or watching a movie at home with some popcorn inshallah. No one ever died from a messy house!